On the Eve of the 19-20 School Year, Self-Care is More Important Than Ever

This post is for the teachers, but not just for them. You know the feeling, one so prevalent that we have a term for it: the "Sunday scaries,"or that dread in the pit of your stomach when you think about going back to work in the morning. And for most of us, this is unavoidable; you can't just quit your job and live off oranges like some modern-day Jim Morrison. Even when you have a job you love (me!), it can still tax you to the point of complete and utter exhaustion (oh, me again). So listen up teachers! I have by no means perfected the cure to the Sunday scaries or the School Year Eve blues, but I think I have a plan to get through this.

Self Care.

And no, I'm not talking about pedicures and drinking whole bottles of wine on Tuesday nights, though these things are still valid options for the hard days. I'm talking about real self-care, the self-care that's hard. The self-care that you don't want to do when you've been on your feet all day caring for 150 little demons or angels, depending on the day or -- let's be real -- the hour.

I'm talking about making your bed every morning so your bedroom looks inviting instead of chaotic. I'm talking about not letting dishes pile up in the sink so that future you gets to come home and look at your space lovingly and with pride instead of heaviness in your chests when you consider all the work you have to do. I'm talking about washing your face twice a day, even when you don't want to. And moisturize, folks! It's five minutes in the morning and night during which you can literally shower yourself with love for a job well done. You deserve to feel peace at least that often.

If you're rolling your eyes or scoffing at how impossible it is, trust me, I get it. Do I have a plan for the school year? Yes. Will I fall off the wagon? Also yes. Will I get back on because the journey to peace and self-love is nonlinear and I freaking deserve happiness? Also also yes! So what my ADHD brain is trying to say here is... you deserve to live a life of joy, even and especially in your most stressed state. And while you also deserve bubble baths and facials and naps, just take note that you're not using these passive activities as avoidance tactics instead of real self-care. (Full disclosure, that little tidbit came from my therapist, Deb. She's a gem).

So because I love lists, I've made you one below of some of the things you can do to take care of yourself this school year, or -- for non-teachers -- your immediate future. A note: self-care is, unfortunately, an act which is much easier with some privilege, but I'm going to try and include activities that absolutely anyone can try along with some for more privileged folks.


1. Go to Therapy.
At this point, I'm fairly certain that everyone who knows me even slightly knows I see a therapist regularly, and while they probably roll their eyes at my very frequent preaching about going to therapy, I'm secretly glad they all know. I've practically as many diagnoses as the DSM-V, and I'm done being ashamed of that. I deal with my mental illness, and I don't let it run my life. That's a triumph. And I want everyone to have the opportunity to get to a place where they embrace their acronym cocktail brain as well. And you don't need to "have anything" to benefit from therapy! A counselor could teach you healthy ways to deal with stress and good ways to deal with work-related conflict.

Buuuuuuuut, I know how much of a dumpster fire insurance can be in this country, so if in-person therapy isn't an option for you, consider this article about free and affordable online counseling. You don't have to tell a soul. Try it out. Find yourself a Deb.

2. Clean Your Space.
This is the one I struggle with. After working all day, not only do I not feel like cleaning my house (physically and mentally), I often literally do not have the time to do it. But when I force myself to wipe down the counters or make my bed or scoop the litter box, I feel a little swell of pride like "Wow, I'm pretty strong and capable and that's cool." That little swell is nice. Work for it.

3. Take Care of Your Body.
For some, this means eating vegetarian or vegan, hitting the gym regularly, and getting a perfect eight hours every night. But for normal humans, I think something as simple as trying to eat a little more healthy or sleeping ten minutes more a night could do the trick. As I've mentioned, I also love my skincare routine. I do this every morning and night, and it takes about ten minutes. It feels AWESOME to wash off the stress of the day, and on a particularly difficult night, I repeat really nice things to myself while wash, which brings me to my next point...

4. Keep Your Self-Talk Positive.
Corny, I know, but effective. My rule of thumb is to speak to myself only in the same ways I would speak to my students or a puppy. If I lock my keys in my car, I am not "so stupid"; just forgetful. See what I mean? Most people can agree that humans deserve kindness, so why not start with ourselves?




There are plenty more, I'm certain, but these are the few I've chosen to focus on. Give one a try! Even the slightest change in your life can bring on peace.

Good luck and teach on, my friends!

Teacher Appreciation Day

Hello, all! 
I haven't written in quite some time (please don't check how long... it's embarrassing), but inspiration hit today. That's because it's a very important day: Teacher Appreciation Day! 
For those who don't know, when I'm not writing, I am teaching. And it is hard. Best case scenario, I get to be a parent, instructor, disciplinarian, shoulder to cry on, life coach, language expert, behavior manager, figurative firefighter, secretary, mandated reporter, and me all in one day. This time of year, I also have to be a test administrator, a cook, a Dr. Phil stand-in (middle school drama is REAL, my friends), and much more. Worst case scenario, I will take a bullet for your child, and I may not even be able to save their life.

But I go home smiling.

Every. Single. Day. 

Because even when it's not Teacher Appreciation Day, I know how important my job is. Even when they are driving me nuts by seeing how loud they can clear their throats until I start yelling, I go home happy. And that's for one reason, and one reason alone.

I love it. 

No, I love them.

They are worth it, every last one of them. They are worth every sleepless night I lose worrying about the girl with the eating disorder or the boy who is getting abused at home. They are worth the mountains of paperwork. They are worth the days I spend engineering lesson plans that please the state, my boss, my students, their parents, and me. They are strong and sensitive and immature and intelligent and complicated and annoying and wonderful. They are, right now, my whole life.

And, yes, I have days where I cry my way home from work because I'm frustrated or feel helpless, but there are also days like this:

Some kids dressed as the Romanovs
for a living museum assignment
 (Rasputin included!)

The real Romanov family... spot on, right? 

After converting Edgar Allan Poe short stories to
scripts, here are my kids in costume getting ready to perform their plays on stage. 

The anthology in which about a dozen of my kids are published.

So despite the fact that it is Teacher Appreciation Day, this one is for you, kiddos. You are endlessly cherished, and we believe in you every day you walk into our classrooms and beyond. Go into the world, and do great things.

Love,

Your teachers.